Family and Training
Many members of
the NOC share their homes with partners, relatives,
friends, colleagues and many have children. Their feelings
about your ordination are important, and must be carefully
and fully explored from the start. Don’t be alarmed
if their reaction is mixed.
Your DDO or equivalent will want to be a part of the
family discussion. (The Ministry Division publishes a
helpful document, Ministry & Family Life,
which you may be given). Remember that there is no single
ideal model for a minister’s domestic life and family
relationships.
What does the Course do for Families?
During part-residential training, the primary
support for Course members’ families will continue to
be your local church and community, and that is as it
should be. But to that is added the network of Course
members. The staff offer whatever friendship and support
they can and are available to you at all times: more
important support may come from fellow-students and their
families. Each group finds its own ways of sharing the
experiences of the Course with those at home; this may
include sharing meals or events, and prayer support. You
may be surprised to discover that on part-residential
Courses the sense of community and commitment to each other
is strong, and develops rapidly.
This form of training can be demanding
for families as well as for the course member. We recognise
and value the contribution that the household makes to the
successful completion of the training programme. The Course
has no right to make any specific demands of members’
partners or children — they are not the ones who have
been recommended for training! However we do try to offer
some opportunities for partners, and to a lesser extent
children, to link into the pastoral, spiritual, academic
and social life of the Course if they want to. Partners can
enrol for the weeknight modules if they wish, and are also
invited to come to certain Course weekends. At any time
Course members or their partners can talk in confidence to
the Chaplain. Pastoral care at a distance is not easy
— but the NOC seeks to be a genuinely supportive
community.